The random ramblings of a perpetual procrastinator. These are the life & times of a nursing home CNA navigating the ups & downs of living with someone who's living with a disability. A sometimes amusing, sometimes bittersweet look at my journey into real adulthood.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Thank heavens, because otherwise I might have killed myself.

Today was better than yesterday, so there's hope for tomorrow.  Woo hoo!  What a great feeling!

Things are getting easier at work.  Bear in mind that "easy" is a relative term.  I'm more comforatble & efficient in my work, but there will never be enough hours in the workday to get everything done.  It's really sad, but there's just not enough help.  We're being taught the proper way, but being told to prioritize & do the best we can in the time we have.  It's not a perfect situation, but I definitely think great care is being provided.  If I didn't, I wouldn't work there.

Before I started, I was so nervous about being sad with elderly residents - but I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it!  They are so much fun to be around.  I'll be heartbroken when I go through my first resident death, but the positives definitely outway the negatives.

After a week of training, I've already pinpointed fellow class members who I think just won't cut it (and here's hoping they don't because they're really irritating!). 

Nurse B, the trainer I mentioned in my last post, is a great teacher - but she is not a coddler.  She tells it like it is, especially in a clinical setting.  Ultimately, she's responsible for the saftey & welfare of all the residents we perform care on during training.  If we screw up the resident might get hurt, & it's her head on the platter.  Naturally, that impacts her demeanor towards us. 

There's a group of girls in my class who are upset about it.  Some take the, "She's just not nice," route; others that, "Oh no she didn't talk to me like that," approach.  Seriously people, grow up!  It's just business (not really, but you know what I mean).  What does it matter if she says something sweet & nice, or if she's stern about it - you still screwed up!  Pull on your big girl panties, because if you can't handle Nurse B you'll never make it.

What I've learned is that the hardest aspect of the job is dealing with co-workers. Women in any workplace are a challenge fucking annoying to deal with. In the nursing profession it's way worse. Granted, some people are really nice & helpful. They understand the only way to get more help is to foster the learning process for trainees. Unfortunately, nurses & aides with that attitude are few & far between.

And then, there are the others. It's a very primal environment; eat or be eaten, sink or swim, survival of the fittest & all that crap. Although it's not an ideal situation, I'm up for the challenge. I take my work very seriously no matter what I'm doing, but this is a whole new ball game because it's personal care.

I'm there to do a job, & that's that.  I'm more than willing to be a kind, helpful aide, but at the end of the day I don't need people to like bring it bitches!!


  1. Yeah, annoying coworkers are every where (I've finally realized this after teaching in three different states). But it sounds like you're the kind of person to rise above! Other than that, I'm glad you are liking your job!! You are providing such an important service -- I hope it's as fulfilling for you as teaching is to me :)

  2. EXACTLY! I just go to work to WORK! The office I work in is A HOT MESS! These women AND men are DRAMA! Its like high school ALL OVER AGAIN! So petty! Ok I am done lol Hang in there! Glad you are loving what you do =D