I have done nothing for at least the last week.
When I say nothing, I of course mean working out.
I'm not going to make excuses for myself because the whole point of buying a treadmill was so that I could work out without going anywhere, which was my biggest hurdle.
However, I haven't been sleeping properly, which I think has added to my generally bad mental mood.
There's nothing wrong with my life. Sure, DJ & I hit little bumps in the rode like everyone else does. But we've got a great relationship, a beautiful home & a horde of naughty furballs who we love. I have no reason to feel so down in the dumps - but I do.
I'm working on trying to pinpoint what it is, which has been difficult since none of the usual suspects are the cause this time.
But today was better. For the first time in a while I slept properly, & I feel better already. I've decided to give myself a few more days to try to figure out what's causing my funk & (hopefully) keep on sleeping. Then, it's back on the bandwagon...or back on the treadmill, I suppose.
I'm not going to give up, I'm just going to accept that I'm starting over - & I'm determined to make it work.
Showing posts with label Why I'm crazy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Why I'm crazy. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
I'm a crazy person.
My MIL & I resumed work on my flower bed in progess today. One of the things we did was frame it with logs from the wood pile in her backyard.
My FIL thinks it's necessary to have a very large wood pile, even though they have a very small fire pit. MIL is sick of looking at it, so she tries to pawn the logs off onto anyone who will have them. It was a bonus for me, because it makes the flowerbed look really nice.
But, back to my point - which is the fact that I'm crazy.
It's nothing new, but I've got one more reason to add to the list: I'm not ashamed to embarass myself.
My little SIL just got a giant trampoline for her birthday last week. And even though there's nothing slim or trim about me, I couldn't resist jumping on it. So there I am, in all my jiggly glory, jumping on a trampoline...while the classy neighbor is doing yard work.
While I was busy making a fool of myself, little SIL was begging me to go swimming. As much as I love the pool, I was far too lazy to go home for my bathing suit. But because I love the pool far too much, I went ahead & jumped in - fully clothed.
I'm positive that after it was all over the neighbor probably thinks I should be committed, but I'm kind of okay with that.
My FIL thinks it's necessary to have a very large wood pile, even though they have a very small fire pit. MIL is sick of looking at it, so she tries to pawn the logs off onto anyone who will have them. It was a bonus for me, because it makes the flowerbed look really nice.
But, back to my point - which is the fact that I'm crazy.
It's nothing new, but I've got one more reason to add to the list: I'm not ashamed to embarass myself.
My little SIL just got a giant trampoline for her birthday last week. And even though there's nothing slim or trim about me, I couldn't resist jumping on it. So there I am, in all my jiggly glory, jumping on a trampoline...while the classy neighbor is doing yard work.
While I was busy making a fool of myself, little SIL was begging me to go swimming. As much as I love the pool, I was far too lazy to go home for my bathing suit. But because I love the pool far too much, I went ahead & jumped in - fully clothed.
I'm positive that after it was all over the neighbor probably thinks I should be committed, but I'm kind of okay with that.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Just one of those days...
Last night was my last night at work before my 11 day vacation.
So naturally, nothing went smoothly at all.
Actually, I shouldn't say that. Everything was fine until about 4:45 AM.
At 4:45 AM I was on my way to empty my dirty linens, & as a passed one of the resident's rooms I heard the most awful noise.
A nurse & I went running in only to find sed resident totally naked, covered in poop & bleeding from the head - because she slipped in a puddle of her own pee.
Needless to say chaos ensued & before it was over I was covered in all manner of bodily fluids.
Have I mentioned lately how much I need this vacation?
So naturally, nothing went smoothly at all.
Actually, I shouldn't say that. Everything was fine until about 4:45 AM.
At 4:45 AM I was on my way to empty my dirty linens, & as a passed one of the resident's rooms I heard the most awful noise.
A nurse & I went running in only to find sed resident totally naked, covered in poop & bleeding from the head - because she slipped in a puddle of her own pee.
Needless to say chaos ensued & before it was over I was covered in all manner of bodily fluids.
Have I mentioned lately how much I need this vacation?
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Something's missing
Last night at work my unit was overstaffed, so I was pulled to the Alzheimer's unit to help out.
There's never a dull moment on that unit because the residents are totally mobile & totally confused.
Even though they're in their 70s/80s/90s, they think they're in their 20s/30s/40s & they need to pick up their children at the bus stop right away.
Last night was no exception.
I was doing some paperwork when I heard an alarm - which means someone is crawling out of bed.
I ran to his room hoping to prevent a fall. And staning there in the doorway was the resident - wearing a long sleeve camoflouge shirt & an adult diaper...pants mysteriously missing.
I managed to help him to the bathroom & back to bed without giggling. As I was leaving, I heard some comotion back out in the hallway, so I ran back out to help the nurse.
Imagine my surprise when I encountered yet another resident with a long sleeve shirt & no pants - only this time, without the courtesy of adult diaper or other manner of undergarment.
Yep. This is my job.
Wouldn't trade it for anything.
There's never a dull moment on that unit because the residents are totally mobile & totally confused.
Even though they're in their 70s/80s/90s, they think they're in their 20s/30s/40s & they need to pick up their children at the bus stop right away.
Last night was no exception.
I was doing some paperwork when I heard an alarm - which means someone is crawling out of bed.
I ran to his room hoping to prevent a fall. And staning there in the doorway was the resident - wearing a long sleeve camoflouge shirt & an adult diaper...pants mysteriously missing.
I managed to help him to the bathroom & back to bed without giggling. As I was leaving, I heard some comotion back out in the hallway, so I ran back out to help the nurse.
Imagine my surprise when I encountered yet another resident with a long sleeve shirt & no pants - only this time, without the courtesy of adult diaper or other manner of undergarment.
Yep. This is my job.
Wouldn't trade it for anything.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Happy Easter!
The weather report for today was not good, so imagine my surprise when I woke up to clear, sunny skies.
It's raining now, but my family had plenty of sun to complete the egg hunt portion of our annual Easter party.
I'm the only "kid" who doesn't participate in the egg hunt anymore, which means the hunters range from age 5 to 20 - so my family comes up with somecruel inventive hiding spots.
Oh, & my aunt's dog also participates...& she knows how to open the eggs on her own.
It's raining now, but my family had plenty of sun to complete the egg hunt portion of our annual Easter party.
I'm the only "kid" who doesn't participate in the egg hunt anymore, which means the hunters range from age 5 to 20 - so my family comes up with some
Oh, & my aunt's dog also participates...& she knows how to open the eggs on her own.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Starting to panic a little.
A week from tomorrow I switch to my 3rd shift life.
I'll be honest, I'm a little terrified at this point.
I've never worked 3rd shift before.
I have some great friends & some family members who work 3rd shift where I do, so they've given me the rundown on how it works. I'm sure I can do it - but you know, I'm a nervous Nelly & that will never change.
I haven't heard anything good about my new charge nurse (from both CNAs & nurses alike). I've worked with all kinds of people before, & I'm not afraid to work from someone with (how shall I put this?) personality issues, but things always go more smoothly when you get along well with your co-workers.
So I'm trying to keep my cool & realize that everything is going to work out ok - but the countdown is killing me a little.
I'll be honest, I'm a little terrified at this point.
I've never worked 3rd shift before.
I have some great friends & some family members who work 3rd shift where I do, so they've given me the rundown on how it works. I'm sure I can do it - but you know, I'm a nervous Nelly & that will never change.
I haven't heard anything good about my new charge nurse (from both CNAs & nurses alike). I've worked with all kinds of people before, & I'm not afraid to work from someone with (how shall I put this?) personality issues, but things always go more smoothly when you get along well with your co-workers.
So I'm trying to keep my cool & realize that everything is going to work out ok - but the countdown is killing me a little.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
She did what?
I've talked about my mother before on my blog.
She's a little nutty, & it's amusing to laugh at the crazy things she does. And once again, she didn't disappoint today.
She's at war with her neighbors - but she's the only one who thinks so. Shortly after we moved into the house where she lives now (10 years ago), she & my stepdad were making some improvements on the backyard. They built a new, bigger deck & garden area. These neighbors, who I will admit are a little off, approached my mom in the backyard one afternoon to adress their "concerns" with the home improvements. While I can't recite the entire conversation, I can tell you how it ended.
Crazy neighbor: How would you feel if someone new moved in & suddenly made all these
changes?
Crazy mother: I don't really fucking care how you feel.
I think it's safe to say any cordial, neighborly relationship was over at that point. From then on, my mother spied on them through an upstairs window, & Mr. Neighbor purposely threw sticks & shoveled snow into our yard.
Well, not to be outdone, my mother had a fence built - down only one side of the yard, which happens to be between these two houses. Really mature, right?
After that, she continued with her spying, but they were powerless to throw random things into the yard anymore. That's pretty much how the relationship has continued over the better part of a decade.
She spies so much that she knows all the following informaiton:
And the saga continued this evening, when my mother attended a school board meeting.
Why you ask?
Because Mr. Neighbor works for the school district, & they are planning to make spending cuts - so she wanted to know if he would be fired.
She seriously needs to get a life.
She's a little nutty, & it's amusing to laugh at the crazy things she does. And once again, she didn't disappoint today.
She's at war with her neighbors - but she's the only one who thinks so. Shortly after we moved into the house where she lives now (10 years ago), she & my stepdad were making some improvements on the backyard. They built a new, bigger deck & garden area. These neighbors, who I will admit are a little off, approached my mom in the backyard one afternoon to adress their "concerns" with the home improvements. While I can't recite the entire conversation, I can tell you how it ended.
Crazy neighbor: How would you feel if someone new moved in & suddenly made all these
changes?
Crazy mother: I don't really fucking care how you feel.
I think it's safe to say any cordial, neighborly relationship was over at that point. From then on, my mother spied on them through an upstairs window, & Mr. Neighbor purposely threw sticks & shoveled snow into our yard.
Well, not to be outdone, my mother had a fence built - down only one side of the yard, which happens to be between these two houses. Really mature, right?
After that, she continued with her spying, but they were powerless to throw random things into the yard anymore. That's pretty much how the relationship has continued over the better part of a decade.
She spies so much that she knows all the following informaiton:
- Where & when they grocery shop
- When they are planning a birthday party for their children
- When they are having medical issues
- When the couple separated, & ultimately reconciled
And the saga continued this evening, when my mother attended a school board meeting.
Why you ask?
Because Mr. Neighbor works for the school district, & they are planning to make spending cuts - so she wanted to know if he would be fired.
She seriously needs to get a life.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
It's 11:30 on Saturday night: do you know what your vet is doing?
Mine sounded as if he had been sleeping when he returned my call.
Why was I calling my sexy, silky voiced vet on Saturday night????
Because my stupid effing cat has a hole in her belly.
The thing is, she got spayed on Monday. The vet says things like, "Keep her separated from the other animals," &, "Try to limit her activity."
Hahaha! Isn't he precious?
He's a lovely man, but he doesn't live with these cats. They are the Satan's spawn, of that I am sure.
And so, since Monday I've been giving Kiki her pain meds every morning & periodically looking at her inscision, which has looked good all week - despite the fact that she runs & jumps around the house like a ninja on a mission.
Then, at 11:30, things in our house were winding down. DJ & I were on our respective computers, when Kiki took her customary spot on my keyboard. When she rolled on her back I noticed that I could see inside her inscision, which was not cute at all.
So me, being the level headed girl that I am, started having what I can only assume to a panic attack. And DJ, my rock, offered these words of encouragement: We need to call the vet now because that's going to get infected.
Imagine how much worse that made the panic attack.
So my poor vet got the call. He called back right away & was very gracious about the whole thing. He assured me that she's not going to get gangrene & die tonight like I was convinced she would. He did suggest that I put, & a quote, "a little kitty t-shirt" on her to prevent her from licking it (ewww!) even more. That made me laugh, & snapped me out of panic attack mode.
Unfortunately, I don't have a little kitty t-shirt, or I would so make her wear it. Instead, I think I've got to buy her one of those cone collars tomorrow. I'm ok with any form of cat humiliation at this point, so the cone works for me.
Most unfortunately, however, is the fact that more of you don't live around me so I could refer you & your fur babies to the most patient, kind & wonderful vet there is. He's the best!
Why was I calling my sexy, silky voiced vet on Saturday night????
Because my stupid effing cat has a hole in her belly.
The thing is, she got spayed on Monday. The vet says things like, "Keep her separated from the other animals," &, "Try to limit her activity."
Hahaha! Isn't he precious?
He's a lovely man, but he doesn't live with these cats. They are the Satan's spawn, of that I am sure.
And so, since Monday I've been giving Kiki her pain meds every morning & periodically looking at her inscision, which has looked good all week - despite the fact that she runs & jumps around the house like a ninja on a mission.
Then, at 11:30, things in our house were winding down. DJ & I were on our respective computers, when Kiki took her customary spot on my keyboard. When she rolled on her back I noticed that I could see inside her inscision, which was not cute at all.
So me, being the level headed girl that I am, started having what I can only assume to a panic attack. And DJ, my rock, offered these words of encouragement: We need to call the vet now because that's going to get infected.
Imagine how much worse that made the panic attack.
So my poor vet got the call. He called back right away & was very gracious about the whole thing. He assured me that she's not going to get gangrene & die tonight like I was convinced she would. He did suggest that I put, & a quote, "a little kitty t-shirt" on her to prevent her from licking it (ewww!) even more. That made me laugh, & snapped me out of panic attack mode.
Unfortunately, I don't have a little kitty t-shirt, or I would so make her wear it. Instead, I think I've got to buy her one of those cone collars tomorrow. I'm ok with any form of cat humiliation at this point, so the cone works for me.
Most unfortunately, however, is the fact that more of you don't live around me so I could refer you & your fur babies to the most patient, kind & wonderful vet there is. He's the best!
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Shut your pie hole, dork face.
Happy New Year!
Ok, so I know I'm a day behind schedule, but the sentiment is what's important.
Now back to the blog title, which I'm sure you're all wondering about.
My family was here yesterday for pork & sauerkraut. As is normal for them, there was lots of noise & inappropriate jokes at eachother's expense.
My MomMom drank a whole bottle of wine before dinner was over.
My uncle got lost, even though he's been here before, & my aunt was losing her shit in the car.
Everyone always labels their plastic cups so none of the little ones end up accidentially drinking a cocktail instead of fruit punch. Writing ridiculous things on eachother's cups is sort of a loving tradition.
A few years ago on our annual family vacation my mom was on the phone with my aunt, who was driving with me. Suddenly, & for no apparent reason, my aunt screamed, "Shut your pie hole!" & hung up on my mother. It was hilarious, & it stuck with her all this time. She even got a "Shut your pie hole" t-shirt for Christmas.
In any event, when she wasn't looking someone wrote "Shut your pie hole, dork face," on her cup.
She used it all night too. She's a champ.
Ok, so I know I'm a day behind schedule, but the sentiment is what's important.
Now back to the blog title, which I'm sure you're all wondering about.
My family was here yesterday for pork & sauerkraut. As is normal for them, there was lots of noise & inappropriate jokes at eachother's expense.
My MomMom drank a whole bottle of wine before dinner was over.
My uncle got lost, even though he's been here before, & my aunt was losing her shit in the car.
Everyone always labels their plastic cups so none of the little ones end up accidentially drinking a cocktail instead of fruit punch. Writing ridiculous things on eachother's cups is sort of a loving tradition.
A few years ago on our annual family vacation my mom was on the phone with my aunt, who was driving with me. Suddenly, & for no apparent reason, my aunt screamed, "Shut your pie hole!" & hung up on my mother. It was hilarious, & it stuck with her all this time. She even got a "Shut your pie hole" t-shirt for Christmas.
In any event, when she wasn't looking someone wrote "Shut your pie hole, dork face," on her cup.
She used it all night too. She's a champ.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
17 again?
It seems as though when I go to work I travel back in time to high school.
The biggest pot stirrer is out on medical leave, so & expected a few peaceful weeks without her.
Wrong.
I work with a guy who's been there for 30 years. He's almost 50 years old.
This guy has decades more experience than me...not to mention that he's almost twice my age.
So why, oh why, does he act like a teenage girl?
We were very short staffed last night, which can be a stressful situation.
We had extra help for the first part of our shift, so I took advantage of it - while this guy was standing around talking to the nurse about our Christmas party.
Then, when our help was gone, he started complaining that no one helped him & blah, blah, blah...
Are you kidding me?
Build a bridge, & get over it.
The biggest pot stirrer is out on medical leave, so & expected a few peaceful weeks without her.
Wrong.
I work with a guy who's been there for 30 years. He's almost 50 years old.
This guy has decades more experience than me...not to mention that he's almost twice my age.
So why, oh why, does he act like a teenage girl?
We were very short staffed last night, which can be a stressful situation.
We had extra help for the first part of our shift, so I took advantage of it - while this guy was standing around talking to the nurse about our Christmas party.
Then, when our help was gone, he started complaining that no one helped him & blah, blah, blah...
Are you kidding me?
Build a bridge, & get over it.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Finally!
Guess who's excited.
This girl!
Wanna know why?
Perhaps some of you remember me lamenting about my dryer issues here.
Well, I was out of the house for a few hours today, & when I got back I was asking the universe (Out loud, because I'm crazy!) to please give back my iPod cord which has been M.I.A. for at least a week - but that's another story.
At that point, the boyfriend chimes in & says, "I don't know about the iPod cord, but would you settle for a working dryer?"
Turns out, there was no major crisis. The contractors who built the house didn't turn that outlet on because they knew we weren't moving in with a washer & dryer. So, the electrician stopped by this afternoon & all is working well.
Woo-to-the-freaking-hoo!!!!!!!!
Have you ever known someone who was so excited to be able to do laundry?
It's ironic, because I was just complaining on Facebook today about spending my day off at the laundramat - but now I don't have that problem anymore. Yay!
So, I'd like to give a shout out to the universe (And DJ, since he made the calls!) for getting that all worked out...but, I would still like my iPod cord when you have a minute.
This girl!
Wanna know why?
Perhaps some of you remember me lamenting about my dryer issues here.
Well, I was out of the house for a few hours today, & when I got back I was asking the universe (Out loud, because I'm crazy!) to please give back my iPod cord which has been M.I.A. for at least a week - but that's another story.
At that point, the boyfriend chimes in & says, "I don't know about the iPod cord, but would you settle for a working dryer?"
Turns out, there was no major crisis. The contractors who built the house didn't turn that outlet on because they knew we weren't moving in with a washer & dryer. So, the electrician stopped by this afternoon & all is working well.
Woo-to-the-freaking-hoo!!!!!!!!
Have you ever known someone who was so excited to be able to do laundry?
It's ironic, because I was just complaining on Facebook today about spending my day off at the laundramat - but now I don't have that problem anymore. Yay!
So, I'd like to give a shout out to the universe (And DJ, since he made the calls!) for getting that all worked out...but, I would still like my iPod cord when you have a minute.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Put your big girl panties on & deal with it.
Last night my sister & I got our pictures taken for a Christmas present for our mother. The photo place was not overly crowded, but it was filled with crazy people.
There were several families with young children. And you know what? All of them were really well behaved.
The kids couldn't have been better.
The parents - well now that's another story.
Let's start with the pregnant woman. This woman was very, very pregnant. And yet, there she was with her two little ones all dressed to the nines; hair done & everything. They looked really nice. By the time they got to selecting pictures, Mommy to Be was in tears. One of her little ones didn't smile the way she wanted her to...but she was smiling, & the pictures were beautiful. So suddenly, the not so crowded photo studio gets a half hour behind schedule because the walking hormone wants her children to perform on command. You should have bought a dog.
Little sister & I had an appointment at 7. We were there entirely too early, so we just waited. At 7 on the dot the Khaki Family showed up. Their appointment was also at 7 - & Mama Khaki expected to be taken back right away. The poor woman working at the photo studio saw that they had a little one with them, & was up front about the 15-20 minute wait. Maybe Baby Khaki would be happier walking around than she would sitting in the waiting room.
Now, maybe it's just me, but I think when you have appointments like this there's a little bit of a wait to be expected. No? Wanna know what Mama Khaki said? "Well it can't be too long because she gets tired at this time of night."
Why the fuck did you schedule your appointment for that time then?
While we were waiting to select our pictures, the Khaki Family came out of the photo room. Rather than waiting 10 minutes, they rescheduled another appointment to come back & pick their pictures because they just couldn't wait anymore. It was too late, & the poor photo studio employee should have known that Mama Khaki was coming & scheduled more people to work that evening.
By the way, Baby Khaki (who was probably 2-years-old) couldn't have been more pleasant. She & Daddy Khaki were amusing themselves while Mama Khaki wasbeing a bitch rescheduling the appointment.
After all that, we finally picked our pictures out. They looked great & were not nearly as expensive as I expected them to be. Score!
There were several families with young children. And you know what? All of them were really well behaved.
The kids couldn't have been better.
The parents - well now that's another story.
Let's start with the pregnant woman. This woman was very, very pregnant. And yet, there she was with her two little ones all dressed to the nines; hair done & everything. They looked really nice. By the time they got to selecting pictures, Mommy to Be was in tears. One of her little ones didn't smile the way she wanted her to...but she was smiling, & the pictures were beautiful. So suddenly, the not so crowded photo studio gets a half hour behind schedule because the walking hormone wants her children to perform on command. You should have bought a dog.
Little sister & I had an appointment at 7. We were there entirely too early, so we just waited. At 7 on the dot the Khaki Family showed up. Their appointment was also at 7 - & Mama Khaki expected to be taken back right away. The poor woman working at the photo studio saw that they had a little one with them, & was up front about the 15-20 minute wait. Maybe Baby Khaki would be happier walking around than she would sitting in the waiting room.
Now, maybe it's just me, but I think when you have appointments like this there's a little bit of a wait to be expected. No? Wanna know what Mama Khaki said? "Well it can't be too long because she gets tired at this time of night."
Why the fuck did you schedule your appointment for that time then?
While we were waiting to select our pictures, the Khaki Family came out of the photo room. Rather than waiting 10 minutes, they rescheduled another appointment to come back & pick their pictures because they just couldn't wait anymore. It was too late, & the poor photo studio employee should have known that Mama Khaki was coming & scheduled more people to work that evening.
By the way, Baby Khaki (who was probably 2-years-old) couldn't have been more pleasant. She & Daddy Khaki were amusing themselves while Mama Khaki was
After all that, we finally picked our pictures out. They looked great & were not nearly as expensive as I expected them to be. Score!
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
It's times like these I wish I was an electrician.
I have a confession to make. My house is a little messy right now. Okay, it looks like a bomb went off. I really try to keep things tidy all the time, but it tends to get this way after my normal four day stretches at work. I then do a big cleaning overhaul on my day off.
I mention this for several reasons. First, yesterday was my day off, but I chose not to clean. Secondly, I chose not to clean because yesterday was my last day off for 8 days. Sigh.
So, I just inhaled a bagel while I was reading some blogs. When I finish this post I'm going to peel myself off of the couch & get moving for the day.
Here's what I'm hoping to accomplish before work:
Apparently there's something wrong with the line running to the dryer outlet. When the very kind delivery man tried to turn it on, it kept turning itself back off. So even though I own these brand new appliances, I have to find the time to go to the laundromat dry a few loads. Great.
I'm trying to keep calm & just accept that it's not all going to get done today, because there's simply not enough time. Unfortunately, in these situations my OCD gets the best of me. Wish me luck!
I mention this for several reasons. First, yesterday was my day off, but I chose not to clean. Secondly, I chose not to clean because yesterday was my last day off for 8 days. Sigh.
So, I just inhaled a bagel while I was reading some blogs. When I finish this post I'm going to peel myself off of the couch & get moving for the day.
Here's what I'm hoping to accomplish before work:
- Wash the mountain of dishes in the sink.
- Empty litter boxes.
- Take out the trash.
- Sweep & vacuum
Apparently there's something wrong with the line running to the dryer outlet. When the very kind delivery man tried to turn it on, it kept turning itself back off. So even though I own these brand new appliances, I have to find the time to go to the laundromat dry a few loads. Great.
I'm trying to keep calm & just accept that it's not all going to get done today, because there's simply not enough time. Unfortunately, in these situations my OCD gets the best of me. Wish me luck!
Saturday, September 25, 2010
The not so happy hostess!
DJ has a houseful of stinky boys over to play a Warhammer, a table top strategy game they all love. While I'm not exactly thrilled about them having their play date on a weekend that I have to work, such is life. As long as they don't let one of the pets out, I'm ok.
However, one of the stinky boys brought his girlfriend over - & this is creating some issues.
As I'm sure most of you know, I'm an animal love. My own pets are my babies, & I am as protective as a mama should be. So imagine my surprise when this woman that I've never met before walks into my house, looks at my dog - the dog who sleeps with me & who I literally have to hold when I come home from anywhere - & says, "There's my girl."
Now, I know better than anyone that I have a tendency to overreact to, well, everything. So even though the words made my skin crawl, I bit my tongue & decided to be polite. But it doesn't stop there...
She went on to tell me that when her boyfriend first brought her to the house, he informed her that the dog would just bark all night long. But she declared in the car that the dog wouldn't bark at here - & then she worked her dog whisperer magic on Ripley that evening. And guess what? No barking!
After that Ceasar Milan got more of a run for his money because she starting explaining all kinds of dog behaviors & what great personality traits she has. And (here's the best part) even started to tell me what my dog is thinking.
It's been a long time since I've been this angry. I know that most of you will think that this is totally ridiculous, & maybe it is. But this is my house, these are my pets & I don't need some crazy hippy that I don't even know spouting her wisdom.
So now I have two choices: leave an hour early for work & find something to do, or flip the fuck out.
I would love nothing more than to go off the deep end, but I know how hard DJ worked to coordinate this get together with my friends. And I know that he doesn't get to go out & spend time with them very often because of all the physical help he needs. So, I'm going to be the nice girlfriend & keep my feelings to myself.
I'm on my way to work.
However, one of the stinky boys brought his girlfriend over - & this is creating some issues.
As I'm sure most of you know, I'm an animal love. My own pets are my babies, & I am as protective as a mama should be. So imagine my surprise when this woman that I've never met before walks into my house, looks at my dog - the dog who sleeps with me & who I literally have to hold when I come home from anywhere - & says, "There's my girl."
Now, I know better than anyone that I have a tendency to overreact to, well, everything. So even though the words made my skin crawl, I bit my tongue & decided to be polite. But it doesn't stop there...
She went on to tell me that when her boyfriend first brought her to the house, he informed her that the dog would just bark all night long. But she declared in the car that the dog wouldn't bark at here - & then she worked her dog whisperer magic on Ripley that evening. And guess what? No barking!
After that Ceasar Milan got more of a run for his money because she starting explaining all kinds of dog behaviors & what great personality traits she has. And (here's the best part) even started to tell me what my dog is thinking.
It's been a long time since I've been this angry. I know that most of you will think that this is totally ridiculous, & maybe it is. But this is my house, these are my pets & I don't need some crazy hippy that I don't even know spouting her wisdom.
So now I have two choices: leave an hour early for work & find something to do, or flip the fuck out.
I would love nothing more than to go off the deep end, but I know how hard DJ worked to coordinate this get together with my friends. And I know that he doesn't get to go out & spend time with them very often because of all the physical help he needs. So, I'm going to be the nice girlfriend & keep my feelings to myself.
I'm on my way to work.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
I'm not really sure what to say at this point.
There's nothing wrong.
Other than the normal, every day bumps in the road nothing major is bringing me down. In fact, I'm not even down.
But...I just have nothing to say lately. Nothing is inspiring me to write.
So in short, I have not abandoned my blog. And I miss you, my darlings. Just wanted you to know!
Other than the normal, every day bumps in the road nothing major is bringing me down. In fact, I'm not even down.
But...I just have nothing to say lately. Nothing is inspiring me to write.
So in short, I have not abandoned my blog. And I miss you, my darlings. Just wanted you to know!
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Feeling Flustered
I'll admit, I've only been skimming your posts lately & my comments have been scarce.
Sorry. I'm just feeling out of sorts lately.
Nothing is wrong, but I just feel like I can't keep my head above water.
I really need to clean (like, really, really clean; not just tidy up), do some laundry & go to the grocery store - but I'm not motivated to do it before or after work.
I have off this weekend, so I'm planning to get back on track.
I'm also planning to go to this really cool hobby/craft store that just opened up in our mall to buy an overabundance of Halloween decorations. Yay!
Fall is approaching, which makes this girl very, very happy.
Sorry. I'm just feeling out of sorts lately.
Nothing is wrong, but I just feel like I can't keep my head above water.
I really need to clean (like, really, really clean; not just tidy up), do some laundry & go to the grocery store - but I'm not motivated to do it before or after work.
I have off this weekend, so I'm planning to get back on track.
I'm also planning to go to this really cool hobby/craft store that just opened up in our mall to buy an overabundance of Halloween decorations. Yay!
Fall is approaching, which makes this girl very, very happy.
Friday, August 6, 2010
Let me paint a picture
Me, wrapped in a towel; with my hair in another. I've got a bag of dog food in one hand, & a fly-swatter in another. I am hunting a stink bug.
I couldn't go on like that forever, so I lost the dog food - & the towel I was wrapped in.
There I am, naked & bouncing around my kitchen all because of a stupid stink bug.
And you know what? I smashed that bitch!
Now that I've given you the gift of crazy, will you please do me a favor?
My beautiful, smart, funny, kind, caring & wonderful cousin Jill made herself a blog. I'm oh-so happy that she joined us!
Please visit her blog by clicking here & become a follower. I know you'll love it!
I couldn't go on like that forever, so I lost the dog food - & the towel I was wrapped in.
There I am, naked & bouncing around my kitchen all because of a stupid stink bug.
And you know what? I smashed that bitch!
Now that I've given you the gift of crazy, will you please do me a favor?
My beautiful, smart, funny, kind, caring & wonderful cousin Jill made herself a blog. I'm oh-so happy that she joined us!
Please visit her blog by clicking here & become a follower. I know you'll love it!
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
The terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.
I am too hard on myself; always have been, always will be.
Compared to the other girls in my CNA class, I do pretty well. I score well on quizzes, understand the concepts being described & excelled in our first clinical evaluation today.
We had to thicken liquids for residents who have swallowing issues (which, by the way, is 10 times more disgusting than the prolapsed uterus from the other day!).
Liquids (water, milk, soda, coffee, soup, etc) are thicked to one of three consistencies: nectar, honey & spoon-thickened - which is like pudding. Imagine having to drink like that...gross.
Powdered thickener gets added to the liquid & stirred. It doesn't thinken instantly, so you kind of have to approximate what you need & add little by little as necessary. If too much is added it turns to wallpaper paste very quickly.
I was working in a group of 5 other trainees, & I was the only one who successfully thickened to the right consistency. Woo hoo!
Except, my "woo hoo" moment is being interupted by a nagging feeling of inadequecy. Why? I don't know. I think it's a combination of low self-esteem & the fact that I take everything personally. Although the trainer told me my thickening was good, I took all the other critiques very much to heart. She wasn't harsh about it, & she was absolutely right - but I feel like I'm failing miserably anyway.
Given the stress of training, the fact that we STILL didn't make settlement like we were supposed to today because the bank contact we're dealing with is a fucking idiot of another stupid paperwork snafoo & the fact that I got stung by a wasp on my lunch break I am pretty exhausted.
I could cry, but I'm just too tired.
I just want to go to bed & wake up on Saturday.
Compared to the other girls in my CNA class, I do pretty well. I score well on quizzes, understand the concepts being described & excelled in our first clinical evaluation today.
We had to thicken liquids for residents who have swallowing issues (which, by the way, is 10 times more disgusting than the prolapsed uterus from the other day!).
Liquids (water, milk, soda, coffee, soup, etc) are thicked to one of three consistencies: nectar, honey & spoon-thickened - which is like pudding. Imagine having to drink like that...gross.
Powdered thickener gets added to the liquid & stirred. It doesn't thinken instantly, so you kind of have to approximate what you need & add little by little as necessary. If too much is added it turns to wallpaper paste very quickly.
I was working in a group of 5 other trainees, & I was the only one who successfully thickened to the right consistency. Woo hoo!
Except, my "woo hoo" moment is being interupted by a nagging feeling of inadequecy. Why? I don't know. I think it's a combination of low self-esteem & the fact that I take everything personally. Although the trainer told me my thickening was good, I took all the other critiques very much to heart. She wasn't harsh about it, & she was absolutely right - but I feel like I'm failing miserably anyway.
Given the stress of training, the fact that we STILL didn't make settlement like we were supposed to today because
I could cry, but I'm just too tired.
I just want to go to bed & wake up on Saturday.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Is it Sunday already?
It creeps up on you quickly when you work on Saturday...again. Bitter much?
Today is going to be a (sort of) Lazy Sunday. HALLELUJAH!
Here's the list:
Anyway...enough about my bad habits.
The only other big project for today is detachment. Tomorrow starts my last week at my current job. I've decided that I don't care what happens this week. They can say & do whatever they want, because it won't matter after Friday. Since we all know I tend to swing from calm & collected to complete psychotic mess very quickly, the goal for the day (& the rest of the week) is to maintain that attitude.
When I told my good friend (one who shares my very sarcastic sense of humor) when my last day was she said, "I shall call it, Independence Day."
That's my mantra for the week. Whenever I feel myself starting to get crazy, I plan to use that to talk myself down from the ledge. Let's hope it works!
Today is going to be a (sort of) Lazy Sunday. HALLELUJAH!
Here's the list:
- Light cleaning. Amazingly, this week hasn't taken it's usual harsh toll on my house.
- I have to find cat food. My Walmart excursion last night didn't pan out, but it wasn't a total loss. I was able to pick up a baby shower gift for next weekend.
- My hair looks tragic & must be dyed. Since it's summer, I'm going
back to my natural coloras close to my natural color as I could find in a box. I'm bored with the dark hair for now. - And then, there's the laundry. There's always laundry in this house.
Anyway...enough about my bad habits.
The only other big project for today is detachment. Tomorrow starts my last week at my current job. I've decided that I don't care what happens this week. They can say & do whatever they want, because it won't matter after Friday. Since we all know I tend to swing from calm & collected to complete psychotic mess very quickly, the goal for the day (& the rest of the week) is to maintain that attitude.
When I told my good friend (one who shares my very sarcastic sense of humor) when my last day was she said, "I shall call it, Independence Day."
That's my mantra for the week. Whenever I feel myself starting to get crazy, I plan to use that to talk myself down from the ledge. Let's hope it works!
Friday, June 4, 2010
Is the devil you know really better than the one you don't?
I haven't been posting a lot lately because I am an emotional trainwreck. I have a self-diagnosed case of some hybrid mix of OCD & Social Anxiety Disorder, with a dash of depression....you know, for flavor. The stress of finishing out my time at my current job & the new beginning looming on the horizon are getting the best of me. Rather than continuing to be a lump on my sofa, I'm trying to deal with my feelings. My hope is that putting them out there is what I need.
Here's the situation....
Shortly after DJ & I started dating I was offered a promotion at my job. Up until that point I didn't think I had anything to be proud of. I squandered my potential by not going to college, I couldn't manage to have a successful relationship, I couldn't move beyond the stupid mistakes I made when I was younger & I didn't feel at all good about myself. However, I had my job. I poured all my energy into it & put it on a pedestool. It was the thing in my life. I couldn't tell you what my hobbies were, because I didn't do anything other than work. It was a monster I created.
When I was offered the promotion, DJ told me to be very cautious. As an unbiased 3rd party, he didn't think that it was as great as I was envisioning. (It turns out he was right, but don't tell him that!) He was worried that I would be used & abused...& I absolutely was. The promotion was to a salary position, & I had to work overtime the first week - and probably every week after that.
I am in charge of Quality Control & Training. I trained all the new employees, as well as mainted existing/developed new training manuals & everything that went along with them (testing, worksheets, follow-up sessions, etc). This means I'm at the mercy of an employee's schedule. If they only work nights & weekends, that's when they have to be trained.
In addition to that, I perform monthly evaluations on a radmon sampling of everyone's calls. The total number of calls evaluated is based on the number of skills an agent has. Since the company I work for does everything cheaply, we're very understaffed & everyone is trained in just about every area. That makes for some very lengthy evaluations.
But that's not all...
I also: maintain the system that records all the calls, organize a monthly meeting to discuss evaluation scores & identify opportunities for more training, publish almost all Call Center emails, & am direct supervisor to 7 agents. My direct reports are a mix of full & part time employees. I'm responsible to handle all their personnel issues, from schedule requests to disciplinary issues. The full time agents are easy to deal with, but getting together with the part timers means staying late at the end of the day a few nights a week.
All those extra nights & weekends I work don't get me off the hook. I'm still part of a weekend rotation with the other managers & supervisors. Every fifth weekend is my weekend on duty. I work 9-3 on Saturday & am on call for the rest of the weekend. The icing on the cake is, when I work on Saturday (whether for training or because I'm on duty) I don't get a day of during the week. If it's my Saturday on duty I get to leave at 1:00 on Friday afternoon...in theory - but it usually doesn't pan out because I'm behind in my regular work.
Christmas is definitely the worst time of year. We hire full & part time employees in October & November. So on top of all my regular responsibilities, I have to teach a four session training course twice a day in both October & November. During this holiday season I built up so many extra hours that I was able to take four days off in January.
The schedule is definitely the worst part of the job. Although the fact that I wasn't being compensated for the extra hours was a huge problem, that wasn't the only issue. I didn't start out in this position. When I started, I was just another cattle in a cubicle answering the phones. After about 2 1/2 years, I took the QC/training position. At that time, there was a manager in charge of QC/training. I was her assistant. My job was supposed to be to perform the evaluations each month. I fell in love with training, & quickly inhereted that responsibility as well. It was managable because I had no one reporting to me & my manager did all the background stuff.
I loved that position. I thoroughly enjoyed the work I did, & I had a great relationship with my boss. But that is something that also changed when I got promoted. Last year one of the managers left. My boss took her position. I was promoted - to my current job, with all her extra responsibilities. Essentially, I was one person expected to do the job two people had done up until that point.
While my head was still spinning from the change, the great relationship I had with my former boss quickly deteriorated. Even though I really liked her, she is a mega-bitch. That never got directed at me until I made the switch from working for her to working with her. Nothing I have done in the last year has been right. She would always do things different & (of course!) better. It seems to me that when she took a new position, she forgot what it was like to be in the old one. I get that business is business, & I should have just developed a thick skin, but I'm not that person. I am emotional by nature, & I don't want to change that. She made the job so uncomfortable for me.
That, coupled with all the extra work for virtually no extra money finally woke me up. I had fought DJ for so long about getting a new job. I told him this was such a great company, & the people were so loyal. But I was finally in a situation where I allowed myself to ask the hard question...
What the fuck are you thinking?
How have they been "loyal" to me? Everything they did for me was deserved ten times over. Why should I have virtually no personal life for this company, especially when I wasn't being fairly paid? The proverbial bump on the head made me realize that the work I was doing isn't even remotely important in the grand scheme of things, & that's not what I want my life to be about.
So, I found a new job in a new field, & I've got BIG plans! I want to be a comfort to people when they need it, & I'm starting a job that will allow me to do just that. As silly as it may sound, I think that, in my own way, I'm making my mark on the world.
I should be over the moon about the new phase in my life...but lately, I'm not feeling that way. Instead I'm still working my fingers to the bone at a job I'm leaving in a week. I've worked four out of the last five weekends, stayed late several times & am still getting treated like a red-headed step child. I'm so sick of it that I could SCREAM!!!! I'm not sad about leaving anymore, I just want it to be over.
And it will be over soon - very, very soon. However, that causes another issue: my terror about my new job. What if I can't handle it? What if I'm not good at it? What if I can't learn fast enough? I've toyed with the idea of entering the nursing field since I graduated from high school, & until now I've always talked myself out of it. I told myself for all these years that I'm far too emotional to work in nursing.
The gross stuff doesn't bother me. Poop is poop, whether it's yours or someone else's. It's the emotional aspect that scares ms. I finally convinced myself that if someone I loved was in a nursing home, I'm exactly the kind of person I'd want taking care of them. Emotional is good, right? But what if I'm being nieve? What if this job requires an impenetrable skin that I clearly don't have?
And now we've come full circle - to the self-diagnosed (yet to be officially named) OCD/anxiety/depression monkey on my back. Logically, I know that the stress is probably what's keeping the emotional roller coaster I'm on moving. However, I'm having a really hard time convinsing my inner sensy of that.
I'm a mess, & that's the long & short of it. I've dug myself out of every hole I've ever been in, & I hoping this situation turns out the same way. Because if it doesn't, I'm totally fucked.
Here's the situation....
Shortly after DJ & I started dating I was offered a promotion at my job. Up until that point I didn't think I had anything to be proud of. I squandered my potential by not going to college, I couldn't manage to have a successful relationship, I couldn't move beyond the stupid mistakes I made when I was younger & I didn't feel at all good about myself. However, I had my job. I poured all my energy into it & put it on a pedestool. It was the thing in my life. I couldn't tell you what my hobbies were, because I didn't do anything other than work. It was a monster I created.
When I was offered the promotion, DJ told me to be very cautious. As an unbiased 3rd party, he didn't think that it was as great as I was envisioning. (It turns out he was right, but don't tell him that!) He was worried that I would be used & abused...& I absolutely was. The promotion was to a salary position, & I had to work overtime the first week - and probably every week after that.
I am in charge of Quality Control & Training. I trained all the new employees, as well as mainted existing/developed new training manuals & everything that went along with them (testing, worksheets, follow-up sessions, etc). This means I'm at the mercy of an employee's schedule. If they only work nights & weekends, that's when they have to be trained.
In addition to that, I perform monthly evaluations on a radmon sampling of everyone's calls. The total number of calls evaluated is based on the number of skills an agent has. Since the company I work for does everything cheaply, we're very understaffed & everyone is trained in just about every area. That makes for some very lengthy evaluations.
But that's not all...
I also: maintain the system that records all the calls, organize a monthly meeting to discuss evaluation scores & identify opportunities for more training, publish almost all Call Center emails, & am direct supervisor to 7 agents. My direct reports are a mix of full & part time employees. I'm responsible to handle all their personnel issues, from schedule requests to disciplinary issues. The full time agents are easy to deal with, but getting together with the part timers means staying late at the end of the day a few nights a week.
All those extra nights & weekends I work don't get me off the hook. I'm still part of a weekend rotation with the other managers & supervisors. Every fifth weekend is my weekend on duty. I work 9-3 on Saturday & am on call for the rest of the weekend. The icing on the cake is, when I work on Saturday (whether for training or because I'm on duty) I don't get a day of during the week. If it's my Saturday on duty I get to leave at 1:00 on Friday afternoon...in theory - but it usually doesn't pan out because I'm behind in my regular work.
Christmas is definitely the worst time of year. We hire full & part time employees in October & November. So on top of all my regular responsibilities, I have to teach a four session training course twice a day in both October & November. During this holiday season I built up so many extra hours that I was able to take four days off in January.
The schedule is definitely the worst part of the job. Although the fact that I wasn't being compensated for the extra hours was a huge problem, that wasn't the only issue. I didn't start out in this position. When I started, I was just another cattle in a cubicle answering the phones. After about 2 1/2 years, I took the QC/training position. At that time, there was a manager in charge of QC/training. I was her assistant. My job was supposed to be to perform the evaluations each month. I fell in love with training, & quickly inhereted that responsibility as well. It was managable because I had no one reporting to me & my manager did all the background stuff.
I loved that position. I thoroughly enjoyed the work I did, & I had a great relationship with my boss. But that is something that also changed when I got promoted. Last year one of the managers left. My boss took her position. I was promoted - to my current job, with all her extra responsibilities. Essentially, I was one person expected to do the job two people had done up until that point.
While my head was still spinning from the change, the great relationship I had with my former boss quickly deteriorated. Even though I really liked her, she is a mega-bitch. That never got directed at me until I made the switch from working for her to working with her. Nothing I have done in the last year has been right. She would always do things different & (of course!) better. It seems to me that when she took a new position, she forgot what it was like to be in the old one. I get that business is business, & I should have just developed a thick skin, but I'm not that person. I am emotional by nature, & I don't want to change that. She made the job so uncomfortable for me.
That, coupled with all the extra work for virtually no extra money finally woke me up. I had fought DJ for so long about getting a new job. I told him this was such a great company, & the people were so loyal. But I was finally in a situation where I allowed myself to ask the hard question...
What the fuck are you thinking?
How have they been "loyal" to me? Everything they did for me was deserved ten times over. Why should I have virtually no personal life for this company, especially when I wasn't being fairly paid? The proverbial bump on the head made me realize that the work I was doing isn't even remotely important in the grand scheme of things, & that's not what I want my life to be about.
So, I found a new job in a new field, & I've got BIG plans! I want to be a comfort to people when they need it, & I'm starting a job that will allow me to do just that. As silly as it may sound, I think that, in my own way, I'm making my mark on the world.
I should be over the moon about the new phase in my life...but lately, I'm not feeling that way. Instead I'm still working my fingers to the bone at a job I'm leaving in a week. I've worked four out of the last five weekends, stayed late several times & am still getting treated like a red-headed step child. I'm so sick of it that I could SCREAM!!!! I'm not sad about leaving anymore, I just want it to be over.
And it will be over soon - very, very soon. However, that causes another issue: my terror about my new job. What if I can't handle it? What if I'm not good at it? What if I can't learn fast enough? I've toyed with the idea of entering the nursing field since I graduated from high school, & until now I've always talked myself out of it. I told myself for all these years that I'm far too emotional to work in nursing.
The gross stuff doesn't bother me. Poop is poop, whether it's yours or someone else's. It's the emotional aspect that scares ms. I finally convinced myself that if someone I loved was in a nursing home, I'm exactly the kind of person I'd want taking care of them. Emotional is good, right? But what if I'm being nieve? What if this job requires an impenetrable skin that I clearly don't have?
And now we've come full circle - to the self-diagnosed (yet to be officially named) OCD/anxiety/depression monkey on my back. Logically, I know that the stress is probably what's keeping the emotional roller coaster I'm on moving. However, I'm having a really hard time convinsing my inner sensy of that.
I'm a mess, & that's the long & short of it. I've dug myself out of every hole I've ever been in, & I hoping this situation turns out the same way. Because if it doesn't, I'm totally fucked.
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